Gotta Review 'Em All, Part #32: Cutiefly to Golisopod

Part two of the Alolan region edition of "Gotta Review 'Em All". Without further ado...

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#742-743: Cutiefly & Ribombee

• Types: Bug/Fairy [both]
• Japanese names: Aburi, Aburibon
• Categories: Bee Fly [both]

Cutiefly and Ribombee are a pair of Pokemon that, upon their initial reveal back in the days leading up to Sun/Moon, I nodded and went, "well, that's obvious, innit?" A Bug/Fairy dual type is honestly quite obvious, with butterflies already being commonly associated with fairies in popular culture, that I'm frankly surprised that generation VI managed to resist making the likes of Flabebe or Vivillon Bug/Fairy. Bug here we have our very first (and, at the moment of writing, only) Bug/Fairy Pokemon, Cutiefly. And back then, I took at look at it, noted that it's cute, and moved on. Until, of course, I actually played Pokemon Sun and I caught a Cutiefly, it stuck on my party without me really meaning to -- it's just a little placeholder while I tried to figure out what Pokemon I wanted... but then Tatl the Cutiefly started pulling its weight. She took down entire Kahunas and Totem Pokemon all on her own, and grew stronger and stronger, and while she probably isn't the most powerful Pokemon competitively, I ended up falling in love with this little bug fly fairy. It's just so adorable, and I ended up liking Ribombee so much that it ranks pretty highly among my favourite seventh-generation designs... and the seventh generation has a huge, huge influx of wacky sea creatures and unconventional designs that I normally like.

Cutiefly is a pokemon based on bee flies -- and I cannot believe that it took us seven generations to get Pokemon based on anything from the dipteran order. Houseflies, mosquitoes, midges, crane flies, gnats... but honestly it's also an indication of how Pokemon is very happy to save some really obvious design choices (see lions, koalas and pandas for mammal part of this equation) for later generations. And Cutiefly isn't based on any common fly, but rather the Bee Fly (family Bombyliidae). Which aren't really related to bees in any way shape or form other than the fact that Bombyliidae members have bee-like stripes and a down of fluffy hair. While Bombyliids for the most part just look like any generic bug, some, like the Anastoechus nitidulus, look like this, adorable little fuzzy-wuzzies with cute black eyes and a little stinger-nose, something that Cutiefly definitely borrowed from.

And look at Cutiefly! She's clearly a cutie. From the little patterned wings, to the little proboscis, to the nicely detailed eyes and the tiny little spindle-legs, little Cutiefly gives Joltik a run for his money as far as the cutest tiny bug Pokemon go. Cutieflies are apparently able to sense auras like Lucario, although they aren't able to actually learn Aura Sphere, and just use it to hover around flowers about to bloom or people whose auras 'resemble flowers', whatever it means. Whatever the case, Cutieflies are appropriately found in the large flower fields that Oricorio frequent.

Cutiefly then evolves into Ribombee, who is a more generic humanoid fairy, albeit with the same little bug wings and spindly-arms that Cutiefly has. There's also a cute little scarf that she has materialized out of nowhere, and I'm of two minds about this. On one hand, Ribombee is so gosh-darned adorable that I can't dislike her. I mean, I kept her around on my team and fed her cookies and she helps out by one-shotting giant fighting kung fu dragons. But on the other hand, I wished Ribombee had retained more of Cutiefly's bug qualities. Either the fluffiness or the proboscis. Still, I get what they were trying to do with Ribombee, highlighting the Fairy part more than the Bug part, so I don't really mind. Ribombee's a somewhat generic 'cute bug fairy' deal going on, apparently only revealing herself from her tree-trunk lairs if she knows that it's going to be sunny. She has a signature move called Pollen Puff, where she rolls up a ball of exploding pollen to throw at the enemy. If she throws it at an ally, that ally is apparently healed instead.

So yeah, I love my Ribombee, one of the unexpected favourites from the seventh generation. She's just so cute, and her typing is unique and unexpectedly powerful... and come on, can you look at that face and say you hate her? Shiny Ribombee is even PINK. Appropriately, Ribombee gets upgraded into a mighty Totem Pokemon in the Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon games. Yeah. I like this little puffball.

 6/6.

#744-745: Rockruff & Lycanroc

• Types: Rock [both]
• Japanese names: Iwanko, Rugarugan
• Categories: Puppy [Rockruff], Wolf [Lycanroc]

Rockruff is the equivalent to the likes of Poochyena and Shinx, the little mammal that's not Normal-type, but rather a pure something-else. In Rockruff's case, he's Rock-type, a bit of a weird type to assign to Rockruff and Lycanroc, as other than the easily-missable collar of rocks around their necks, they don't really scream Rock-type. The line is apparently based on the Hawaiian Poi, a now-extinct breed of dog that was once part of Hawaiian culture as a spiritual protector of children and a source of food. I guess this is another of those 'extinct' Pokemon? I dunno. Feels definitely a bit of a stretch. Some people back in the lead-up to Sun/Moon tell stories about how apparently the Poi dogs are assigned to a child, and if the child outgrew the dog, the dog's teeth would be made into a necklace or something, but I have yet to find a properly credible source for this legend. So. Rockruff himself doesn't really resemble the Hawaiian Poi that much, instead just being a cute generic little spitz-style dog. He's adorable. I just want to pet him and feed him treats. He's a good boy.

Overall, though, Rockruff is honestly just a generic puppy, but unlike most other dog Pokemon that are all faithful and loyal, as Rockruff grows older, he grows more and more rebellious, until he evolves into his final form -- Lycanroc. Now the thing about Lycanroc is that there are three types... but they're not interchangeable. Once a Rockruff evolves into a certain Lycanroc type, that's it. The thing is that instead of a normal day/night deal to play with the whole wolf/werewolf theme that the Lycanroc forms have, Rockruff's evolution is limited by the version of the game you bought. Midday Lycanroc is only available to Sun and Ultra Sun; Midnight Lycanroc is only available to Moon and Ultra Moon and Dusk Form is only available if you evolve an event Rockruff. Why these three forms don't get three different Pokedex number slots despite being unable to transform into each other, having different stats and slightly different movesets, I don't know. Consistency is not Pokemon's strong suit. Also, why limit the evolution to different games? This is the only Pokemon whose evolution is limited to games. That seems like a headache and completely unnecessary, and I hope, like Deoxys, that they revert this to a more sensible and logical one come future generations.


That said, though, the Lycanroc forms are pretty damn cool. Midday Lycanroc is the more 'natural' evolution of Rockruff, looking like a lithe, thin wolf with spikes of rock jutting from his neck. This is the Lycanroc I had during my playthrough of Sun, and I love it. How can I not? It's a rock wolf, and it has the signature move Accelerock, a priority Rock-type move. Like most real dogs, you actually have to properly raise your Rockruff and it will stay loyal when becoming a Lycanroc. Otherwise, presumably it'll chomp on you. Midday Lycanroc's whole deal is that its mane-rocks are super sharp. Overall, Lycanroc is a very well-drawn cartoon wolf. Which is cool...


But Midnight Lycanroc just has so much personality. It's hunched over with a blood-red skin and a mangy blob of fur on its back, and those glowing pink eyes just look intensely psychotic. Why isn't this Rock/Dark? Midnight Lycanroc is obviously based upon a werewolf, but it's not a human with doggy features stapled onto it either. Midnight Lycanroc has this lanky, feral look to him that many modern-day werewolf depictions miss, and it's clear that Lycanroc isn't just a man with wolf qualities, but a wolf that just happens to stand up like a man. Midnight Lycanroc is just so damn cool-looking, and while I initially dismissed him as awkward-looking compared to his Midday counterpart, I've grown to like the Midnight Form a lot, lot more. Midnight Lycanroc's deal is that it can learn Counter, described well in the Pokedex as it not caring if it gets hurt as long as it can goad its enemies into attacking it, before headbutting the enemy with its rock mane to crush their bones.


Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon, the updated re-releases of Sun and Moon, introduced Dusk Form Lycanroc, who really is just Midday Lycanroc with orange fur. Oh, and also you have to squint a little to realize in all that spikiness, but apparently Dusk Lycanroc went to the barber shop, pointed at a picture of Midnight Lycanroc, and asked the barber to do his hair like that. It's theoretically a combination of the Midday and Midnight form, but in practice... it's barely different from Midday, and for all my praise to the seventh generation for being really creative... no, Dusk Form Lycanroc. You're a lazy alternate form that really doesn't add anything new, and is honestly quite forgettable -- and this is coming from someone who loves Lycanroc.

Overall, though, despite my rather negative views towards Lycanroc's very weird evolutionary restrictions and the superfluousness of Dusk Form Lycanroc, it's still a very well-done wolf evolutionary line, and one that I do like a fair bit, a 'mainstream' cool animal that the seventh generation actually put some thought into, unlike poor Pyroar from last generation.

 5/6 as a set. 

#746: Wishiwashi

• Types: Water
• Japanese names: Yowashi
• Categories: Small Fry

Oooh, this one. Wishiwashi is technically our common Magikarp/Feebas style tiny fish that evolves into a big, scary sea monster, a theme that isn't always repeated as regularly as early bug or early bird... but they actually have a twist in that Wishiwashi's "evolution" is actually an alternate form. Yeah, the seventh generation goes almost as overboard with alternate forms as the fourth, but at least with Wishiwashi it's actually a very, very cool gimmick. See, Wishiwashi is based on a sardine. Specifically, those sardines that form gigantic schools of impressive, undulating masses in the ocean, a whirling vortex of cute fishies whose constant movement makes it less likely for all of them to get eaten by larger predators.

But Wishiwashi is just one of these little fishies! And it just looks so pathetic, with sad-looking eyes that look like he's crying all the time, and a scared-looking mouth. Aww, Wishiwashi, don't be sad! But Wishiwashi's gimmick that when its eyes tear up, it emits a glow to summon an entire school of other smaller fishies, to form the mighty SCHOOL FORM WISHIWASHI, a gigantic legion of Wishiwashis that have transformed into a gigantic, far larger Dunkleosteus-esque monster. And School Wishiwashi is genuinely badass, as seen in this in-game cinematic. Needless to say, I own one, and while never used it as often as my core teams in either Sun or Ultra Moon playthroughs, Legion the Wishiwashi has some really fun mechanics to muck around with.

School-form Wishiwashi is apparently known as the 'Demon of the Sea', and its appearance will scare the shit out of Gyaradoses, with a powerful amount of statline to back its appearance -- School Form Wishiwashi actually has as much stats as some mega-evolved Pokemon. It's a shame that Schooling deactivates once Wishiwashi is knocked below a certain percentage of health, with your Wishiwashi's backup being so scared of the enemy that they break apart and abandon the 'core' Wishiwashi, abandoning him... and at that point, little regular Wishiwashi beats out Sunkern as the Pokemon with lowest base stat total.

How awesome is it, though, as a concept? Wishiwashi's Schooling ability even only works after the little fish reaches level 20, so it's some kind of weird pseudo-evolution. It's a gigantic swarm of Wishiwashis, all lumped together into a gigantic being, and I really do love how it's clear that School Form Wishiwashi's formed out of little fishes, with those eye-shaped pupils, little tails jutting out of the tips of its fins, and the myriad light-blue eyes dotting School Form Wishiwashi's body, especially the hollow interior of its mouth. Hell, the official art and sprite even has a couple of Wishiwashi units that hover behind, detached from the 'tail'. It's a great, great creative move to not actually just draw or render every single Wishiwashi which would be messy, but rather actually have them merge together into this horrifyingly awesome legion and hivemind. Definitely don't expect the first 'swarm' Pokemon to be a school of fish instead of the more obvious insect, for sure. I mean, there's Zygarde, but that's more of a single entity that broke up into multiple parts. Overall, Wishiwashi is definitely one of the unexpected designs from the seventh generation, and a Pokemon that works amazingly well with the tropical theme of Alola. It's one of those rare cases where the form changes feels amazingly integrated into the lore of the Pokemon and the real-life inspiration instead of tacked on needlessly. Good show, Wishiwashi.

 6/6.

#747-748: Mareanie & Toxapex

• Types: Poison/Water [both]
• Japanese names: Hidoide, Dohidoide
• Categories: Brutal Star [both]

Oh yeah, we've got even more marine goodness! The Water type is easily one of my favourite types out there due to the fact that even as a kid I was a huge, huge marine enthusiast, and Mareanie adapts a different side of the starfish than the previous one -- Staryu and Starmie, all the way back in 1995 -- did. Staryu and Starmie adapted the sheer alien-ness of an animal that moved and acted like an animal did, but had no discernible facial features and look insanely alien. Mareanie and Toxapex? They are brutal predators, like actual starfishes are. Real-life starfish feed on coral and are one of the most destructive elements in the ocean that fuck up entire coral reefs, and since coral in the Pokemon world are actual living animals like Corsola, Mareanie and Toxapex are far, far more horrifying because the pokedex entries and in-game NPCs delight in telling us just how brutal these species crush and feed on Corsola, leaving behind nothing but fragments of poor, cute Corsola.

I've written about these two Water/Poison starfishes before, but I'm definitely happy to talk about these two again. Mareanie and Toxapex are based on the Acanthaser planci, otherwise known as the Crown of Thorns Starfish, again, one of the most vicious and destructive predators of coral reefs. When Mareanie's pictures first leaked online many people thought that it's a weird spiky jellyfish, but its inspiration of a starfish is definitely far more clear when its dex entries and pictures of its evolution started to appear online. And Mareanie is everyone's darling! And how can you not love her? The fact that the main body is a little blob-y body with fanged mouth that peek out of the tentacle-like arms that end up looking like hair, plus Mareanie's actual role as a vicious, brutal predator?

Mareanie also shares its real-life inspiration's poisonous barbs (which are genuinely harmful to even humans), with the dex giving us really lovely descriptions of Mareanie's hunting habits -- plunging its head-spike into its prey, and then dealing the finishing blow with its ten tentacles. And, well, it hunts down Corsola. It's actually mentioned that one of the targets of the Aether Foundation, a Pokemon restoration organization introduced in this generation, is to help the Corsola population recover from all the Mareanie predation. Hell, the way that Mareanie actually is encountered in the games? You have to encounter a Corsola, and then keep bullying it to force it to 'call for help'. Most of the times, other Corsola comes in to help, but every once in a while a Mareanie shows up, attracted by the distressed Corsola, and then proceeds to beat up the Corsola before facing you, the trainer. 

Mareanie then evolves into the mighty Toxapex, whose main body has shrunk down to a little angry head that's just hanging from underneath a gigantic dome. See, Toxapex's whole deal is that it's intensely defensive, this generation's answer to the likes of Ferrothorn and Forretress. It's got these badass-looking barbs all over its dome, and in its official art it's shown lifting two of these 'arms' up, and apparently the barbs are retractable, with it having the spines flip in or out depending on whether the tentacle-arms are being used to defend or to attack. And Toxapex is particularly brutal, too, with its signature move, Baneful Bunker, allowing it to hunker down into a little defensive bunker, negate any attack that strikes it, then poisoning the offending enemy that has the poor judgement to punch or bite a mass of spikes. And then Toxapex's signature ability, Merciless, means that it will always get critical hits against a poisoned enemy.

Toxapex, of course, "leaves a trail of Corsola bits scattered in its wake", all the while shooting toxic spikes, that, according to the pokedex, will not just hurt for three days and three nights, but have after-effects afterwards. Toxapex just looks absolutely mean, with her giant dome and her cute itty-bitty head. It honestly gets even neater when you realize how a starfish actually eats -- it crawls over a prey and traps it with its arm, and then expels its own digestive tracts out to digest the prey underneath it, meaning that even the location of Mareanie and Toxapex's "heads" actually corresponds to. That's so cool! Pokemon doesn't have to score 10/10 in biology accuracy to look cool, but Mareanie and Toxapex get bonus points for doing so yet integrating it into a very pleasant, awesome-looking design.

Overall, what's there not to love about these 'Brutal Star' Pokemon? Easily one of the best designs and the best highlights of the seventh generation. Lots of fives here, huh?

 6/6.

#749-750: Mudbray & Mudsdale

• Types: Ground [both]
• Japanese names: Dorobanko, Banbadoro
• Categories: Donkey [Mudbray], Draft Horse [Mudsdale]

We go from those fun marine animals to a pair of more mundane Pokemon. Mudbray and Mudsdale are just mud horses, and due to their association with mud, they're Ground-type. And, again, there isn't really much wrong about just adapting an animal and keeping it simple, because the two of them are definitely well-drawn, and is definitely very distinct from the likes of Rapidash, adapting a donkey and a bulky Clydesdale horse respectively. Mudsdale's bulkiness definitely contrasts well with Rapidash. It's just that, well, they're somewhat bland is all. Mudbray's a cute donkey with a very funny set of eyes, and apparently unlike a real-life Clydesdale's legs, which have a large amount of fur, Mudbray actually just has hardened mud on its legs. Mudbray apparently even eats mud as its diet.

Mudsdale a pretty cool looking bulky horse with neat dreadlocks and huge chunky lower legs, and as one of the Pokemon summoned by the whole 'ride pokemon' gimmick, and being the signature pokemon of Hapu, one of the major recurring characters in Sun/Moon, Mudsdale definitely has a big presence. Again, though, it's just my personal preference that don't really consider bulky horses anything beyond 'neat'. In addition to being a powerful, unstoppable horse that can run up and down mountains, Mudsdale is also a powerhouse, with its signature move, High Horsepower, being just a horse kick powerful enough to cause an earthquake. Mudsdale and Mudbray's signature ability, Stamina, also continually buffs up the horses' defense stat anytime they're struck by an attack.

Overall, they're all right. I don't find them super-special, but I don't mind them at all. And honestly, it's a matter of personal taste, because I'm not interested in horses all that much, and am far more excited about water-bell spiders and carnivorous starfishes. Some people are the other way around, dismissing the entire bug kingdom as 'icky' and fangasming over big mammals like horses and wolves, and that's completely fine. Everyone's got their own taste, and that's what Pokemon is all about -- there's many people out there who truly love Mudsdale and think it's one of the best things out of the seventh generation, and I'm happy for those people that Mudsdale exists.

 3/6.

#751-752: Dewpider & Araquanid

• Types: Water/Bug [both]
• Japanese names: Shizukumo, Onishizukimo
• Categories: Water Bubble [both]

Dewpider and Araquanid are another pair that I've talked about before, and boy, these Bug/Water types are pretty awesome, aren't they? After Surskit all the way back in the third generation, we've never actually gotten any more Bug/Water types since then until this generation, where we not only get one, but two very awesome aquatic bugs. The first one is Dewpider, based on Argyroneta aquatica, the Diving Bell Spider. The Diving Bell Spider is an arachnid that decided one day to hunt not on land, but underwater. One problem -- spiders use book lungs to breathe, which means that they can't breathe underwater... so they use their legs and webs to carry a bubble from the surface with them underwater as a little scuba tank to swim and hunt. Some even build a nest underwater using bubbles anchored to underwater plants! And Dewpider is exactly the same... except that instead of being a terrestrial spider that carries an air bubble underwater, he's a true-blue Water-type, so Dewpider is an aquatic creature that carries a bubble of water onto the land so that it can hunt. How awesome is that?

Dewpider also uses this bubble-covered head as a bludgeon, apparently, and I really do like the general weirdness of its design. From its tripod-shaped body, to the fact that the other three legs are holding up the spacesuit-esque bubble around his head... also love the weird, large eyes and the little horns (which might be meant to represent additional eyes?)... Dewpider's such an unexpected design for a spider, and has such a pleasingly natural combination of colours too. The only real problem I have is its weird bird-like mouth, but I don't mind that so much. Of course, apparently it's just going to be a running gag that all Pokemon based on spiders have only six legs, so, um... okay, then.

Needless to say, I trained one of these during my playthrough of Ultra Moon, and that's fully because of its final stage: Araquanid. And Araquanid just looks so goddamn cool, looking like this weird space monster creature with prominent jointed legs, a head wrapped in a bubble... and, oh boy, what an awesome-looking head. Those wrap-around Yanmega-esque eyes look positively badass, coupled with the four opposing fangs that look absolutely horrifying. And awesome! Araquanid looks pretty damn cool, and it follows through with Dewpider's very pleasant colour scheme. My only real complaint with the design is the honestly unnecessary addition of the weird bubbles on the leg joints. Maybe I'd like it more if the official art and game sprites actually depicted them as being transparent, like the head-bubble? '

Regardless, though, Araquanid is pretty cool. The dex entries are puzzlingly contradictive, though, with the Sun dex entry noting that Araquanid uses the water bubble to drown smaller Pokemon, while the Moon dex entry notes that Araquanid uses the water bubble to protect vulnerable, weaker Pokemon. Ultra Sun adds on the grisly by noting that if Araquanid is full, he will store the 'subdued prey' in the water bubble, whereas Ultra Moon notes that due to Araquanid's penchant to store precious things in the bubble, sometimes it'll attempt to store its trainer in its bubble! Yeah that's not nightmarish at all.

Practically every other second Pokemon in this generation gets a unique ability, and Araquanid's is Water Bubble, which makes Dewpider and Araquanid even more resistant to Fire-type attacks and gives this thing immunity to being burned. Oh, and it boosts the attack of the Water-type moves (which already get a boost from Araquanid being inherently a Water-type). Araquanid is pretty badass, and needless to say, easily one my favourite designs in the game. And Nintendo apparently thought it so as well, making Araquanid the signature Pokemon of trial captain Lana in the games, and even replacing the Totem Wishiwashi boss fight with a Totem Araquanid. Overall... pretty badass.

 6/6.

#753-754: Fomantis & Lurantis

• Types: Grass [both]
• Japanese names: Karikiri, Rarantesu
• Categories: Sickle Grass [Fomantis], Bloom Sickle [Lurantis]

I've wanted a traditional praying mantis bug for the longest time. Scyther is badass and all, but he sheds the mantis inspiration upon evolving into a bug robot. So when I saw Fomantis and Lurantis, I was excited. Cool, a mantis Pokemon! And one based on the Orchid Mantis (Hymenopus coronatus) one of the more distinct praying mantis variants in that it mimics the shape and colouration of orchid fllowers to ambush unsuspecting bees and butterflies who just want to have a neat little nectar drink. Of course Nintendo's going to make the orchid mantis Pokemon Grass/Bug, I mean, that's obvious, isn't it?

...except no, Fomantis and Lurantis are pure-Grass, and for the longest time I scratched my head. I mean, they're certainly plant-based, for sure, but they're based on mantis, right? It's in the name? Until I realized that while the real-life orchid mantis is a bug that looks like a plant... in the Pokemon world, Fomantis (faux mantis, get it?) is a plant that looks like a mantis. I mean, plants in the pokemon world have apparently evolved into really wildly independent-looking humanoid monsters, so why not have one of them resemble an insect? Fomantis is pretty cool, too, with its mantis sickles being clearly just sharp leaves. But, as its dex entries note, it's still an ambulatory plant, looking for sunlight and photosynthesizing, and the dex notes that Fomantis and Lurantis's bug-like appearance is due to intimidation purposes.

And Lurantis is pretty badass. Sure, I think it could do with one less detail or two, but the end result is surprisingly pleasing. From Lurantis's gigantic scythe-arms, to the weird kimono-esque flared pants and that wacky flower thing on her back, Lurantis does look pretty graceful and deadly at the same time. Lurantis, of course, is one of the few Alolan Pokemon promoted into a 'totem' boss fight in Sun and Moon, and it's got its personal signature move, Solar Blade, which is basically like Solarbeam, but makes use of Lurantis's more powerful physical stats, and its animated as a gigantic sword of light that slams down upon the enemy. It's a wee bit too messy, I think, to really earn a 5/5 from me, and I really wished it communicated the fact that it was a plant a bit better... but ultimately, Lurantis and Fomantis are definitely every welcome additions to the Pokemon party. I don't really have that much to say about them beyond the fact that it's a really, really cool subversion of a real-life animal.

 5/6.

#755-756: Morelull & Shiinotic

• Types: Grass/Fairy [both]
• Japanese names: Nemashu, Mashedo
• Categories: Illuminating [both]

Morelull and Shiinotic are our second set of Grass/Fairy Pokemon, a typing combination previously unique to Cottonee and Whimsicott. And boy, what an appropriate plant to turn into a fairy, because in a lot of fairy tales, little fairies are very much associated with hanging out on toadstools, and thus Morelulll and Shiinotic play upon that trope, adapting a bio-luminiscent mushroom to add a hint of real-life eeriness to the phantasmal fairy theme of these things. Morelull, design-wise, is pertty neat. Two cute beady eyes, a lower body that's just the mycorrhiza, a bunch of toadstools growing out of the main body... it does speak to Nintendo's biological research, because all those fancy toadstools you see are only the reproductive parts of a mushroom, whereas the main bulk of their biomass is really the mycelium network that the toadstool mushroom structures sprout out of. 

Morelull also ramps up the creepy factor, clearly not being the friendly sort of fair folk. The dex entries note that Morelull will scatter spores that flicker and glow, causing anyone who so much as sees these lights to fall into a deep slumber. It acts like a real mushroom, sleeping in the day while draining nutrients from a tree, and waddles around in the night to find a fresh new tree to parasite on. Apparently, despite their danger, Morelull spores end up being a common tourist sightseeing site in Alola. Morelull is pretty cute, and I've loved the fact that it only shows up at night, being the night-time counterpart to the first-generation fungi Paras and Parasect. The seventh generation does this a lot, pairing up newer species as counterparts to older ones, and I do love it. 


Morelull evolves into Shiinotic and... yeah, I don't like Shiinotic quite as much as the weird simplicity of Morelull. Shiinotic feels just a bit too lazy, reducing the unique design of Morelull to a weird humanoid with a huge toadstool hat... but at least Shiinotic's got its own charm. And I say 'charm' in a very loose sense, because holy fuck is that face creepy as hell. Shiinotic's an evil fairy, too, with forests inhabited by Shiinotic being particularly treacherous to enter, since the lights emitted by this creepy luminescent mushrooms will cause people to get lost and get sleepy. And, as the Moon Pokedex notes, "when its prey succumbs to sleep, this Pokemon feeds on them by sucking in their energy. Yeah, Shiinotic's pretty goddamn creepy. The 'Mushroom Man' trope of monsters is commonly seen in many other Japanese-originated fantasy culture, and while Gloom is kinda-sorta one, it's not quite a mushroom, so Shiinotic's visual design is certainly new for Pokemon, and what a unique take on the mushroom man trope it is! 

Overall, Shiinotic is a great design. I really prefer Morelull a lot, though I do admit that the addition of a mouth does turn Shiinotic so much creepier than it would've otherwise have been. There are some parts of Shiinotic that I probably would've personally changed if I had the chance to redesign the concept -- I'm not the biggest fan of its weird diaper-like lower body, for example -- but at the same time, both Morelull and Shiinotic are honestly pretty well designed, pretty creepy and pretty cute at the same time. 

 5/6.

#757-758: Salandit & Salazzle

• Types: Poison/Fire [both]
• Japanese names: Yatomori, Ennyuto
• Categories: Toxic Lizard [both]

I'm genuinely surprised that we've never gotten a Fire/Poison Pokemon before the seventh generation, because burning acid or flammable acids have been such a common trope in fiction. And this particular Pokemon is a little poison-spitting lizard mixed with the mythological fire-breathing Salamander. And Salandit's also a cheeky little bastard, with its face and the two neck-horns meant to be evocative of how burglars are stereotypically drawn in Japanese culture. It's a salamander bandit! And Salandit's a very well-drawn lizard. From its cheeky eyes, to its sharp claws, to its posture, to the lines of magma running down its back and tail... Salandit's a pretty cool design. Apparently its burning poison is so powerful that its unique ability, Corrosion, means that Salandit's poison attacks can bypass a Steel-type or even a fellow Poison-type Pokemon's immunity, something that's pretty dang awesome. They're even based on a real specific salamander in mind, the Japanese Firebelly Newt, a black-coloured, poisonous salamander. 

Salandit also brings back a gimmick that's been unseen since the fourth generation... the fact that only the very rare female Salandits are able to evolve into their final form, Salazzle. Ultra Sun gives us the explanation why -- the female Salandits rule over their society, causing the males to scurry around and do whatever the females ask them to, and due to this, they're all malnourished. Whoa! For a burning toxic reptile, that's some unexpected expansion to the species's lore than I expected. Only the female Salandit are able to reach their final form, something that's actually found in the Teiidae family of Whiptail Lizards, where only female members of the species exist due to the unique way that they reproduce. 

 4/6 for Salandit.

I'm not a big fan of Salazzle as I am of Salandit, but I do like Salazzle a lot more than the likes of Lopunny. Salazzle is, obviously, meant to resemble a curvaceous woman... something that takes a pretty nightmarish turn when some of the official Pokemon site writeups for Salazzle note that it uses pheromones to attract and control males of different species... including humans. The Sun dex even uses the specific term "reverse harem" to explain the fact that Salazzles rule over a large amount of male Salandit. Salazzle's honestly pretty cool once you get past the (probably intentional) creepy human-like qualities, with long, tapering claws, and a very lizard-like tail and face. It ends up being a bit too risque for my liking, and I honestly wish that they had gone for something less obviously "sexy curvy lizard lady with markings resembling a nightgown", though, which is just begging for creepy hentai artists to sexualize. So yeah. The concept of a race of burning poison lizards, of whom only the females can evolve, is pretty cool. The execution of Salazzle's design... not so much. I don't quite hate on Salazzle as much as I do some of the other Pokemon that, well, I've ranted on and on about, but it's certainly a design that I really wish ended up being somewhat redesigned. 

 2/6 for Salazzle.

#759-760: Stufful & Bewear

• Types: Normal/Fighting [both]
• Japanese names: Nuikoguma, Kiteruguma
• Categories: Flailing [Stufful], Strong Arm [Bewear]

Oooo lookit this thing it's so fucking adorable I just can't. What a good boy! Stufful is a little baby bear, but not just any baby bear -- it's a baby teddy bear! Bear Pokemon have been some of the least interesting designs since they're just invariably big anthropomorphic bears, but Stufful is just so gosh-danged adorable. From the pink candy-shaped head, to that adorable line mouth, to those cute piddly legs... and, hell, it's even got a little price tag on its butt! Its animations in-game is also so adorable, with it shutting its eyes and flailing its legs wildly, it being extremely adorable in Refresh, and its attacking animation has it stumble partway through. D'awwww. Stufful was a Pokemon I didn't care about when it was first revealed, but when I saw it in game, my heart melted. 

And Stufful's actually the exact opposite of what teddy bears are. It's a Normal/Fighting type, and when it gets angry, its arms and legs are powerful enough to knock a pro wrestler away or to split trees in half, and it'll only allow itself to be petted by its trainer, otherwise it goes on a wild frenzy. Hell, even when Stuffuls call each other for help in the wild, they end up beating up each other! Also, the silly price tag organ is apparently something to release odours it uses to communicate with its kind. 


And then Stufful evolves into Bewear, on the surface looking like a silly, mis-matched cartoon bear with a weird white tiara on its head (it's meant to evocate a mascot costume commonly seen in Japan -- and Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon actually has a wild Bewear hiding amongst actual mascot costumes), but it's one of those cases that an awkward-looking design ends up being won over due to just how great the anime and games portray Bewear. See, Bewear's name isn't just a bad pun. Despite its permanent resting face, Bewear is one of the most dangerous creatures in Alola, with the Moon dex noting that thanks to Bewear's back-breaking bear hugs, "many trainers have left this world after their spines were squashed by its hug". Yes, not even Bewear's own trainers are safe from it, and it's not a rampaging monster like Salamence either -- it's just trying to show affection! Unfortunately, said affection literally snaps a trainer's vertebra into two, and that's just some really, really dark shit. And those are the friendly, well-trained Bewears.  The ones in the wild are just as violent as real-life bears, but due to their appearance and their intimidation displays looking like a happy teddy bear waving at you, a lot of people fail to escape in time, and, as Ultra Sun tells us, "life is over" for them.

Bewear is such a fun design with loads of personality, leading me to utilize one in my Ultra Sun playthrough. Stufful and Bewear have the unique ability 'Fluffy', which halves all damage from moves that make direct contact, but gives these teddy bear Pokemon extra weakness to fire. Overall, Bewear and Stufful are a pair of Pokemon that I didn't pay that much attention to back the designs were originally leaked, but now probably rank pretty highly among my seventh generation favourites. Stufful's just so adorable!

 6/6.

#761-763: Bounsweet, Steenee & Tsareena

• Types: Grass [all three]
• Japanese names: Amakaji, Amamaiko, Amajo
• Categories: Fruit [all three]

Each generation does kind of like to introduce their own plant Pokemon, and I welcome them! This generation's Bounsweet, Steenee and Tsareena are based upon the mangosteen fruit, otherwise known as the 'Queen of the Fruits' in some parts of the world. A mangosteen is definitely appropriate for a tropical setting, so why not? Design-wise, I wasn't terribly impressed with their of these three, who just go from a fruit with legs to a humanoid plant. It's not a particularly exciting evolution, and we've seen similar concepts before in the likes of Cherrim and Liligant. But these three are pretty well-drawn and adorable, and both Steenee and Tsareena, being humanoid plants, are definitely far, far more distinct-looking and unique compared to the genericness of Liligant.

Bounsweet, the base form of this evolutionary line, is just a straightforward half-peeled mangosteen with little nubby legs and the cutest face ever, yet one of the most hilariously distressing dex entries ever. See, Bounsweet's dex entry isn't surprisingly dark in the sense that it causes harm to others like Honedge or Bewear, but rather because, being a fruit, Bounsweet is often chased down by bird Pokemon. But because of its grinning, happy face and its hop-skip gait, no one thinks Bounsweet is in distress because it looks so happy, even though the poor thing is running for her life. That's the description from the official site, whereas the pokedex themselves note that Bounsweet is often 'swallowed whole' by Toucannon, and that it's 'not intelligent enough to care'. The Ultra Moon dex entry even adds a layer of mockery on Bounsweet, noting that its attempt to fight off bird Pokemon is a, and I quote, a 'fruitless' attempt. Eh? Fruitless? EH?

Anyway, Bounsweet becomes Steenee relatively quickly, and Steenee is... well, she's cute. I'm not the biggest fan of humanoid plant Pokemon unless they have some sort of weird plant anatomy, but Steenee's a pretty pleassant one. Between the incorporation of the actual mangosteen flesh into Steenee's funky dress, to the really cute eyes, and the leaves being turned into a neat set of hair, Steenee's design is pretty interesting. Apparently Steenee uses her sepals to whack enemies like some sort of crazy pigtail weapons.

Steenee evolves into her final form, Tsareena, by learning the move Stomp, and Tsareena is a Pokemon whose most distinguishing feature is her long, long powerful legs... but for whatever reason, Tsareena still is a pure-Grass type instead of Grass/Fighting type? It's weird, but I suppose fruit monarchs aren't really martial arts per se. Tsareena's definitely an unexpected final form, being based on a queenly figure with a cute little crown on her head, nice flowing hair and... a really, really awkward body. The fact that her neck, torso and abdomen all kind of clump into one thin column above her mangosteen skirt and her gigantic high-thigh boots does give a weird silhouette, but I like it! It's distinctly feminine and regal without looking sexualized -- and fruit-people have no business having a hourglass figure anyway. Tsareena's whole deal is that those long, long legs aren't just for show (although Alolan beauty salons apparently use her as a mascot), because Tsareena uses them to kick the enemy, and is somewhat of a sadist, cackling over her fallen enemies with glee. This has led into some fan interpretation that Tsareena is based on some sort of a sadistic dominatrix, which I don't really see.

Her signature move is "Trop Kick", a physical Grass-type move... and it really would've been a perfect move to be dual-typed just like Hawlucha's Flying Press. But oh well. Overall, Tsareena isn't quite interesting enough and doesn't really appeal all that much to my own personal tastes, but honestly, the seventh generation has really strong offerings, and in a good day I'd easily give this evolutionary line a higher mark. I don't have anything that makes me go "oh yeah I love these guys" about these other than the fact that they're neat, but at the same time I don't have anything negative to say about them either. 

 3/6.

#764: Comfey

• Type: Fairy
• Japanese name: Kyuwawa
• Category: Posy Picker

Huh. This guy. Comfey is based on a lei, one of those flower wreaths often found in Hawaii, and and she's apparently a version of Klefki that, instead of being a cheeky little key-stealing kleptomaniac, is just a generically cute and graceful little sprite that collects flowers on its weird vine-tail. It's all right, I guess, but I truly can't think of anything much to say about Comfey. It's pure Fairy-type, because presumably like Flabebe it just collects the flowers instead of being one... despite Comfey learning more Grass-type moves than Fairy-types? It's not particularly that interesting or novel of a concept. It's the obligatory healing-based Pokemon of this generation, and it's honestly terribly uninteresting. It's inoffensive, is what I can say,  but it's easily one of the most forgettable designs in the seventh generation, and it's a shame since it's one of the few Pokemon in Alola that's distinctly based on something from Hawaiian culture as opposed to generically tropical. Oh well. 

 2/6.

#765: Oranguru

• Types: Normal/Psychic
• Japanese name: Yareyutan
• Category: Sage

Oh, yay, this duo! After so many generic monkeys in the fifth generation, finally the seventh generation branches out to other parts of the primate order, giving us a Pokemon based on the Indonesian primate, the orangutan (literally meaning forest person). These members of the Pongo genus are some of the largest apes, and some of the most intelligent ones out there. and as someone who spent a significant amount of his life in Indonesia, it's definitely a pleasant surprise to see another one of Indonesia's rich wildlife adapted into a Pokemon. Oranguru is a Normal/Psychic monkey, another one of those where the Normal sub-type really felt tacked on for no real reason. Oranguru's not particularly interesting, basically an orangutan with a charmingly weary face and based on some sort of an Asian guru, with that nice purple cape and a funky Zhuge Liang fan. 

Oranguru's descriptions are sadly a bit too generic for my liking, though, making him relatively bland despite being based on a pretty unique pokemon. I guess there's just not much you can do with an ape? It is established to live high up in canopies, and sometimes will wander off to beaches to match wits with fellow smart Psychic-type Slowking, and it will straight-up scoff at inexperienced trainers. Ultra Sun's dex adds the very interesting tidbit that some Oranguru have figured out how Poke balls work, and gives other Pokemon orders as it pleases, something that is reflected in its signature move Instruct, allowing Oranguru to tell its partner in a double battle to re-use the same move. Overall, Oranguru's a neat design and concept, but one that doesn't really feel like that much has been put into it. "Hey, an orangutan's kind of cool, we haven't made one of those. Let's give it psychic powers, and call it a day". Considering the amount of effort they put in so many other Alolan Pokemon, Oranguru feels pretty minimal-effort. Still decent, though.

 3/6.

#766: Passimian

• Type: Fighting
• Japanese name: Nagetsukesaru
• Category: Teamwork

While Oranguru is exclusive to Moon, Sun players get Passimian instead, a pure-Fighting type primate Pokemon based on Varecia variegata, the ruffed lemur. And whereas Oranguru is a solitary species that likes to meditate, Passimians are a bunch of rowdy, active monkeys modeled after American football players, using berry shells as helmets and always depicted with a berry as a ball. Passimians apparently gather around in troupes, sticking leaves onto their body with saliva and deciding who's boss depending on their berry-passing skills. Passimian  has the signature ability Receiver, which will allow it to copy the ability of a defeated ally. Overall, though... I just can't really get into the spirit of this thing. It doesn't look particularly like a Fighting-type Pokemon, even, unlike the obviously-some-sort-of-psychic Oranguru, and Passimian's the one that really should've had the Normal-type stickered on to it. I don't really mind Passimian, honestly, but at the same time, again, I don't have much to say or like about this one. 

 2/6.

#767-768: Wimpod & Golisopod

• Types: Bug/Water [both]
• Japanese names: Kosokumushi, Gusokumusha
• Categories: Turn Tail [Wimpod], Hard Scale [Golisopod]

Yes! My isopod babies! Yeah, I was super-hapy when Wimpod was announced. While sharing some characteristics with silverfishes (Lepisma saccharina) in terms of behaviour, its shape and name makes it unambiguous what it's based on -- isopods. Isopods are an order of crustacean whose habitat stretch from land to freshwater to seawater, and Wimpod in particular is based upon aquatic ones. These are our second Bug/Water Pokemon of our generation, and what a pleasing shape it is! It's hard carapace, spiky tail, antennae and sharp purple blade-like 'mustache' all lead to a very pleasing look, and its skittish, worried-looking eyes tell us about Wimpod's personality. It's a goddamn wimp, and its ability, Wimp Out, causes it to run the hell away (i.e. leave a battle) if its HP goes down below half. In the actual games, you actually do have to chase down Wimpod physically (usually atop a Tauros) before they scatter back to their little lairs, because they're such cowards they'll never actually appear to challenge you in a battle. Like the coastal isopods that Wimpod is based upon, they're scavengers that eat anything they can find.

Wimpod already appealed to me when I first saw it in among Alola's earlier reveals, but when its final evolution was leaked in the days leading up to Sun/Moon's release, I knew that I had to have one of these in my party. Long story short, I caught Wimpod at the earliest possible opportunity, and it grew into a mighty Golisopod and easily the biggest hitter in my party. I love this thing! I spoke about Wimpod and Golisopod in a previous issue of Pokemon of the Week, and I'm so happy to speak about these again. 

There are some really gigantic isopods deep underwater, like the Bathynomus genus, which count among the largest arthropods still living in the present day, reaching up to sizes of 36 centimeters. So clearly the Pokemon version of these massive bugs has to be a giant humanoid with big-ass mean-looking claws that end in two blade-like fingers, an awesome face, a hunched-over posture vaguely based on ancient samurai armour, and little extra limbs that hang out of its... neck? What would you call that part of it anatomy? Golisopod's general look is so badass, so insanely different and so gloriously bug-like that I fell in love with it the first time I saw it, and when my own Wimpod evolved into one and I mucked around with my giant isopod samurai in Pokemon Refresh and realized that its little bug face-arms are retractable, I fell in love with it so much. It's not just a creepy bug Pokemon, it's one that is designed to be visually cool, generally awesome, and it's got immense stats to boot, not only dealing powerful Bug and Water type physical attacks but also having a range of various 'cutting' attacks. Its even got its own personal signature move, First Impression, a move only usable if it's Golisopod's first turn on the battlefield, easily the most powerful physical Bug-type move.

Of course, even though it's grown to a big badass bug samurai, Golisopod is still a coward at heart, and I absolutely love that it still has Wimpod's Wimp Out ability... but it's renamed "Emergency Exit". Oh, Golisopod. Golisopod ends up being the signature Pokemon of one of the story main antagonist, Guzma, who, like Golisopod, is a big tough gangster boy but really is all vulnerable and broken inside. It's also a glorious subversion of the Magikarp/Gyarados theme. Sure, the little weak bug does evolve into a big badass monster... who's still a coward at heart. Oh, Golisopod. 

Golisopod's still a massive monster in spite of its crappy ability, though, both in-game and in-universe. Apparently its claws can slash seawater or even air itself in two, and the shell on its body is as hard as diamond. It's also a fan of meditating deep in the ocean, apparently. It's a badass deep-sea creature, and as a relatively reccently-popularized creature, both Golisopod and his real-life counterpart certainly deserves the popularity they have -- they are both pretty damn exotic, majestic creatures. Golisopod is one of those creatures whose design and concept would've easily given it a 4/5 or 5/5, but they gave him such a fun personality and a really, really awesome silhouette with its oversized arms and hunched body. Golisopod is, without a doubt, my favourite Pokemon from the seventh generation, a creature that's not just based on an interesting creature, but with its own spin. Rock on, you cowardly deep-sea bug samurai. 

 6/6.